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April 20th, 2005
02:22 am - and i think it's gonna be a long, long time.
i feel good. ridiculously tired, but good. i drove back and forth so much today - chesapeake, the beach, chesapeake again, home, chesapeake. between friday's and back, and home - gosh i live in one city and work in two other cities.
sometimes i am so tired when i drive home that i travel a few miles on the interstate without realizing i'm still in fourth gear. it hits me and i laugh to myself, quickly shift, and drive home in sort of a daze.
i'll have details tomorrow.
Current Mood: totally exhausted.
Current Music: elton john - rocket man.
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March 1st, 2005
02:23 pm - and then i found a plane and wrote these words in the sky: one more goodbye.
a productive enough day so far, i suppose. got rent money from the bank and paid a few bills, went to finder's keepers to replace the ball for my conch bar. the lady didn't make me buy a whole new bar like i figured she would, and to top it off she was really impressed with my ear (i have this super crazy piercing that i guess not a lot of people have) so she took a picture of it to put on the wall of the shop when i told her i had gotten it done there. then she gave me a new ball for free so that was really nice. i'm doing laundry now and will play guitar until i have to get ready for work. i hope tonight is as dead as it was last night because i definitely didn't have to work too hard. monday nights are awesome, like this great vacation from a horrible weekend, and they keep me sane about my job. mental note: ask selina the name of her volkswagen guy and hopefully get my car to him on thursday, my day off. i would like to have it fully functional before the drive to DC on monday.
Current Mood: accomplished, i guess
Current Music: m.ward - one more goodbye
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February 27th, 2005
12:19 am - the torch has been passed.
el music survey
How many total songs? 988 in itunes. i haven't imported like six folders yet.
Sort by Song Title - first and last?
first: 99 problems by jay-z
last: yr boyfriend by casiotone for the painfully alone
Sort by Time - first and last?
first: twinkle echo theme by casiotone for the painfully alone
last: man the ramparts by botch
Sort by Album - first and last? [only on tracks where the album is listed]
first: $5 EP by the oranges band
last: you're a woman, i'm a machine by death from above 1979
Top Ten Played Songs:
1. take me anywhere - tegan and sara
2. game of pricks - guided by voices
3. never leave a job half done - pedro the lion
4. bailey park - tullycraft
5. c'mon, c'mon - the von bondies
6. we are going to be friends - the white stripes
7. jeane, if you're ever in portland - casiotone for the painfully alone
8. simple economics - pedro the lion
9. this will be our year - the zombies
10. happiness is a warm gun - the beatles
Find "sex," how many songs show up? 14
Find "death," how many songs show up? 11
Find "love," how many songs show up? 49
Find "peace", how many songs show up? 6
Find "rock", how many songs show up? 87
___________________________________
1.Total amount of music files on your computer? 6.3GB
2. The last CD you bought was: girls can tell - spoon
3. What was the last song you listened to before reading this message? song against sex - neutral milk hotel
4. Write down five songs you often listen to or that mean a lot to you.
why did ever we meet? - the promise ring
when they really get to know you they will run - pedro the lion
this temporary life - death cab for cutie
dying batteries - casiotone for the painfully alone
my dream girl don't exist - neutral milk hotel
5. What 3 people are you going to pass this baton to and why?
cusackpixie
robotsarered
promise_ring
dudes!
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February 26th, 2005
11:21 pm - of corporate restaurant employees and their meaningless, nonexistent lives.
so i'm not technically a corporate employee because i work for a franchise group. but seriously, i've spent the entire day in a daze. i feel mental exhaustion coming on and i hope i can hold it together until shonen knife. where did the month of february go, and jaunary for that matter? i guess this is what being grown-up feels like. days turn into weeks that turn into entire months just lost. brett hates me because i never have time to go out with him, and angela thinks i'm a total flake. i might as well just give up while i'm ahead.
going in to work on my day off is stupid. i guess i really didn't have much to say.
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February 23rd, 2005
08:44 pm
my new idea of personal heaven:
snapple by the case, and falling asleep on the couch with the television on.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/smile.gif) content
Current Music: the clash - train in vain
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February 22nd, 2005
06:08 pm - she almost ruined everything.
i feel a little better than death today, especially now. work was a breeze, it was totally dead all day. i made it in by 7am, sat through that bogus meeting until 10, and then the rest of the day dragged on but uneventfully, thank goodness, because i couldn't have handled much more. i am still feeling stuffy and very weak and my stomach is bugging me. tomorrow is my day off, and if i feel awful then i'll stay home and live it up in bed. if not, then the following is my to-do list:
norfolk public library to get a new card and check out books
post office to buy/send money order for the tullycraft 7"s i won last night on ebay
volume cd exchange (or relative theory, i'm not really sure) to buy some cds
dishes, general around-the-house cleaning
send off some penpal letters
maybe go to target
pay some bills.
my new favorite snapple flavors are pink lemonade and go bananas!. the pink lemonade is strange because i usually abhor all things involving lemonade, that stuff generally makes me ill just thinking about it. i am bound and determined to try every snapple flavor ever, even the diet ones. snapple apple sucks, though. it can kiss my ass. i might go to karaoke tonight for the first time in forever or i might stay home and watch tons of television and play guitar and get a lot of sleep. i actually slept enough yesterday to catch up for weeks.
Current Mood: ba ba da ba ba ba ba
Current Music: pedro the lion - never leave a job half done
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February 21st, 2005
12:39 am - we're living in violent times.
dear livejournal,
there is one and only one reason i am okay with having worked all fucking day. if i had not left at 11pm tonight and had i not been too tired to throw a cd in my car deck, i would never have found out about this, which is apparently syndicated on the classic rock radio station (which is the only radio station i will ever listen to) on sunday nights and it is seriously the best thing ever. who knew there was such a great garage-rock radio show and that i could actually hear it - this gives me a really great reason to not work sunday nights. livejournal, i'm really tired of being ill. i want to be able to work these fourteen hour days with no problem like i used to but this cold is just wearing me down to no end. if i don't feel better tomorrow i'm calling in sick, so there. thanks for the raise, dudes! i make $10.75 an hour now, i think that's pretty sick, and it's definitely $1.75 more than i was making when i started. i want to go downstairs and fall asleep with the television on but i'm too tired to move. oh yeah, and thanks direct tv, for so many goddamned channels and the N! now i can watch degrassi episodes all the time !
please let me wake up and not be sick.
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February 17th, 2005
06:06 pm
i am terrified that 130 channels of direct tv in my posession will turn me into a television junkie, but i convinced myself today at least that it's just this side effect of being sick. yes, i still feel like death. i hate that naproxen sodium is the only medicine that helps my symptoms but totally makes my skin crawl. and even now i feel worse than i did yesterday, missing an entire day of work which almost never happens. but with the company of ER, judging amy, law and order and gilmore girls, i am feeling more sane than bored out of my skull but still pissed off because i hate feeling like this, and annoyed that my room is a fucking mess but not being able to do much about it except whine incessantly to myself. and i keep calling brett and whining to him which makes me feel like even more of a loser.
Current Mood: still death.
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February 16th, 2005
11:38 pm - we sit side by side in every class.
why am i always sick on my days off? it felt like a crime not going out and enjoying the sixty plus degree weather and brett and i were definitely supposed to go to wanna-be's tonight [all karaoke, all the time] but instead i bought cold medicine and orange juice and have been in bed most of today, except the two hours of law and order i watched on the couch a while ago (hello, television). i feel like death. back to bed.
Current Mood: death
Current Music: the white stripes - we are going to be friends.
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01:04 am
p.s.; i am and always will be addicted to snapple, although it is way too hard to find here (especially in mass quantities. this girl used to buy it by the case). oh yeah, and i totally really definitely want to see this movie as soon as it comes out. it looks awesome even though i am not the biggest fan of british kids.
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12:22 am - and i feel so alive yet i feel so alone.
..cause you know you're the one and that that hasn't changed since you were nineteen and still in school waiting on a light on the corner by sound exchange.
[in a recent conversation sarah asked, "where have you been for the last six years?" and i replied, "obviously not listening to spoon."]
there are tons of things i love and hate about my job and one of the things i love is the saute station. it's easy as hell to close down and if you know how to work it right (in my case, sandbagging chicken all night) it isn't hard to work and it's fun cause you're flipping shit over a range all night, making pretty pastas, and firing those damn sizzles. the one thing i hate about it is that it's really hot over there and it's so damn greasy; my skin feels oily if i stand over there for more than five minutes. gross. i don't get to work over there nearly enough but that's about to change pretty soon, and i'm sure i'll get really tired of it after a while. i'm off tomorrow but have to meet with dickbag (my boss) to go over the kitchen schedule because i guess i'm writing that now. things are in the works for the new stores (williamsburg and mechanicsville) and i totally hope i'll get picked to go open them because that would be awesome. go team friday's. these weekdays are like a vacation to me, and when the weekend comes around it is nonstop.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/blah.gif) okay
Current Music: spoon - anything you want.
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February 12th, 2005
09:53 pm
worked way too long and hard today. my saturday night will probably be spent paying bills. awesome !
got off around 7:30, went home and changed and then ran over to visit my cousin. he cracks me up, always telling some funny story. i realize that i like to surround myself with hilarious people to make up for my own lack of a sense of humor. i don't try to be funny often because i just end up sounding like an asshole. but brett is my best friend (who is not jared) because we like and hate the same things but mostly because he can make me laugh harder than anyone else i know, which is sweet. his band is playing a show at CBGB's tonight and i hope that is going well for him.
decided sometime yesterday that i will begin writing a zine again and will probably call it vacation like my last one (the oranges band zine not counting in this) but it will be more of a personal thing. that and my newfound interest of making t-shirts (screen printing, people! photo emulsion! liquid speedball!) should round out my list of hobbies enough to where i am not coming home from work every day, reading a book and going to bed. making insane road trips is not included in those hobbies although it probably should be, along with the things that happen as a result of roadtrips like seeing bands, drinking beer and trying to pick up cute bartenders. ha!
Current Mood: good.
Current Music: palomar - albacore
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01:07 am
he friendster-messaged me (!).
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February 7th, 2005
01:00 am
to me, one of the absolute worst physical feelings in the world is being too tired to go to sleep, which is what i am in the middle of experiencing. i am physically exhausted but my mind won't shut down. i flopped onto my bed, deciding to shower in the morning because, after all, i wasn't ridiculously disgusting and i could not stand on my feet for ten minutes in the shower. i thought about this for literally an hour in bed and changed my mind; i hate this. i can handle blisters on my toes and callouses on my hands but i cannot handle being this tired and i'm glad i don't let it happen often.
my legs will always be scattered with bruises as a result of my lack of grace, which joel said often was only in my head. being clumsy is real to me. incoherence is my vice.
Current Mood: dead
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February 6th, 2005
03:20 am
i don't necessarily know if these eighteen(plus!) hour shifts are getting easier because i'm getting used to them or if this weekend is just going well. we'll see how i feel around 10pm tomorrow and then again on monday morning. the good news is that everyone attending the stupid coach seminar on monday night is supposedly going out afterwards to get hammered, and while i'll probably be tired danielle and i were probably going to go anyway to make fun of people. she is awesome and it sucks that she's leaving for a month, and if she doesn't come back i'll kill her. i should be kicking myself for being on the internet instead of being asleep right now.
Current Music: desaparecidos,still.
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February 2nd, 2005
09:34 pm - same as the way that you roll your eyes when i ask too many stupid questions.
you always answer the phone when i call even if i wake you up. we are finally at the point where we can hug eachother and it isn't weird. we stood outside in the cold, wondering if david bazan was going to cover 'political science' by randy newman this time (he didn't, he covered neil young, but we heard good old randy during soundcheck) and getting way too excited about shonen knife in march. sometimes i wonder how we've come this far, how after we hurt eachother and i avoided you for more than a year that we have survived it all. why i keep analyzing our friendship and can't accept it for what it is. how even when you are in new york, and i am terrified of you being more than an hour and a half away, you will usually if not always be there for me. for all the bad things that have happened, you have always been there and i am so lucky that you are around. that we both ended up in the same place at different times and managed to take advantage of what was there. that you let me sleep on your couch and deal with me, all the time. that this is growing easier as we grow older but it was only ever as difficult as we made it, that i will always want to share every part of my life with you. thanks again and i meant what i said.
Current Mood: curious.
Current Music: pedro the lion - i am always the one who calls.
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January 26th, 2005
11:52 pm
brett saw some band tonight that he described as sounding like "minus the bear-meets bruce springsteen" and i almost choked on the image of dave knudson meeting springsteen in some dark alley, clocking him over the head with bruce's guitar, tapping on it for a few minutes and then proceeding to beat the shit out of him. you don't mix those two bands together for any reason but he and i both thought that was pretty funny.
i live for insanity, chaos, and the fastest possible pace at work, which is probably why i am always so tired when i finally get home. more soon.
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January 23rd, 2005
01:19 pm - and the moment will come when composure returns.
sundays were made for belle and sebastian.
have you ever really broken down the hours in your day? not so much as waking up, having your day, and going back to sleep, but looking at it in more of a twenty-four hour sort of way. when you do this, and you realize that out of twenty-four hours you have spent eighteen of those at work, on your feet, with no real break, figure in another thirty minutes of driving-to-work time, then you try and calculate in your head exactly what percentage of your day involved your job, it is fucking insane. i returned at 8:30am this morning, bleary-eyed and freezing, after leaving at 2:30am from that eighteen hour shift and was sent home by noon amidst talks of numbers, with a cookie in my hand and my hat on my head. stopped at my mom's house where there was a fire in the fireplace, the living room was warmer than i had ever remembered it being, and then returned to the freezing upstairs of my house and put on my pajamas. a free sunday off, well most of it, it's like one of those weird monopoly cards where you get twenty-five dollars for no real reason. a free afternoon to read more of the hotel new hampshire under the covers, and at once i realize that this is the most simple and quiet my life will ever be. the drafts in this old house will never let the thermostat pass sixty-five fahrenheit when it's this cold and windy outside. the sun keeps peeking out and hiding again, and i'm sure i sound delirious but i feel perfectly lucid. chapel hill, here i come next weekend, accompanied by a person with whom i have never truly fallen out of love.
Current Mood: clear
Current Music: belle and sebastian - sleep the clock around
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January 20th, 2005
08:16 pm
oh and p.s. - for now the third night in a row i've consumed hashbrowns for dinner (of the ore-ida shredded breakfast variety) and this is the first time they came out perfect. working in a kitchen does not necessarily teach you how to cook; in fact i believed i've learned more non-cooking skills as a result of my kitchen jobs (like learning how to microwave just about anything and make it look like you actually cooked it). sometimes it makes me laugh that i do this for a living right now.
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January 18th, 2005
09:01 pm - out in the wind, above the ground out in the w e a t h e r.
today was fine. no remnants of a hangover save a late afternoon mild heaache; easily ammended by two regular tylenol, thirty minutes of high fidelity and a two hour nap. bought typwriter ribbons and tacks to hang things on my walls, moved my bookshelf and all of my books from the crazy empty green room across the hall to right next to my bedroom door. found a newport news public library book that has been missing for months, talked to my cousin on aim for a minute and found out he's coming here in the beginning of february to help my uncle james with some jobs. he's staying in my grandparents' house (they're both in a home now, it's really sad) but it's so awesome to have my cousin visit because he is one of the only family members that i actually like. i hope we can listen to classic rock and fight about clapton and journey and get wasted and jam out. when jared isn't here (which is most of the time) i don't have anyone to play with - angela isn't good enough on drums yet to actually play anything. speaking of angela i haven't heard from her yet. i took a bunch of stephen's letters and the few lettie jane letters i have and hung them on the wall in my bedroom in that empty alcove space and it's looking a lot better - hopefully by tomorrow i'll have lots of photos hung up and my room will look like somebody actually lives here (for the first time since i've moved in). the bookshelf issue is a problem because i own way more books than will fit on it so there's actually stacks of books on the floor in front of it for the time being. i don't know how to fix this because i have no room for another bookshelf so i guess i should just quit buying books.
a brief interlude - angela and ben just came home and i went downstairs to be social for a minute.
so i think i'm supposed to go to see that topher grace/scarlett johansen movie with george cox tomorrow at some point. ryan might call back tonight, but i doubt i'll leave the house - it's fucking freezing and i want to finish making my room look livable. i am suddenly, once again, all about old saves the day. i can play screeching weasel and guided by voices songs on my guitar to keep my hands warm and curl up in front of my space heater and black out with the help of six blue pills.
Current Mood: you had yourself a crazy lover
Current Music: becoming frozen trying hard to forget her.
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jeremiahweiss's journal